Regarding my decision to go to graduate school at OSU as opposed to Columbia

It has been a long long time since I last blogged. I was distracted by another blog (sorry for this infidelity, my dear Painting) and an issue of grave importance. All of my work at applying to graduate school culminated in my being accepted to Columbia's MA program in Sociology. A dream come true no? Casey and I had been struggling with the idea of staying in Columbus for two more years, and we both wanted to move to NYC.

Well no actually. Below is the email I received from Columbia in regards to admittance. Note that I only received this email of admittance after having emailed the school in the middle of April to get the status of my application. In other words, they had simply forgotten to notify me.

Dear Mr. Adams,

I am sorry that you have not received notification of your admission status... The faculty admissions committee in Sociology, unfortunately, was unable to offer you admission to the PhD program. However, you and a select few other applicants were offered admission to the Master of Arts degree program. The department could enroll only 7 new PhD students this year and thus many fine applicants could not be offered admission to the PhD. And this year, because of the financial situation, we has to cut back the number of offers of admission. But since your application showed promise, the faculty offered admission to the MA program.

Great, I thought! I cannot tell you the sheer joy I experienced upon receiving this email. This was it. It was perfect. I was going to Columbia, an Ivy League school. No one could refuse me admittance into a PhD program with the brandname of Columbia on my CV. And Casey and I would move and all would be glorious.

Then, reality sunk in. First, the program I was admitted to was the free standing masters program, and it was designed for business people (gag) and public policy makers. Why was I admitted to this program in the first place? I have absolutely no experience whatsoever in anything practical or applied. I only know theory.

Further, the program was unfunded. The tuition for the one year was lower than expected... only $17K, which I feel is a manageable and even reasonable amount of debt for a masters degree. However, combined with the exorbitant cost of living in NYC and the fact that I later discovered that my bf would not be able to move with me right away, so I would have to find roommates or pay for a closet on my own, makes this choice less glamorous. In fact, I might be committing financial suicide by going there.

The job situation is tenuous enough right now. To move to NY without any prospect for a job is frankly foolish for me. And even if I were to get a job or two, (which I would have to do!!) most of my time then would be spent on making money to keep afloat in the city, not on graduate work, which should be my number 1 focus right now. All of these difficulties are exacerbated by the fact that the Columbia program is one year... simply not enough time to produce a glorious, publishable thesis that could guarantee admittance into a FUNDED PhD program.

Then there is good old OSU. I received their admittance letter the day I returned from Africa. OSU is relatively cheap, Columbus is so so so cheap, and the geography program here is top 5 in the nation. Also, the MA here is research and theory oriented, so I don't have to worry about all that practical applicaiton bs. I'll have two comfortable years in which I can apply to PhD programs and produce a kick ass thesis. Also, I was recently rehired by WOSU to answer phones and do research for Open Line. This is such a great job!! :) I get paid next to nothing, but it is 20 hours a week, M-F (so weekends off.. yay to cheap beer at Bodega happy hour) and I love it. What more can you ask for honey?? (As my gma would say.)

I still get sick to my stomach when I think about throwing away the opportunity at Columbia. Was this my chance to make the transition to New York and get my foot in the door of a top ranked school/program? Maybe. Am I throwing it away? I look at it as putting into a treasure chest and locking it up for a couple of years, and then getting it out and seizing the opportunity when I have funding and can actually afford NYC (and by afford, I still mean struggle to survive on a stipend of 23k when at least half of it will go to rent.)

And I am in such a zen place right now. I am happy here in Columbus. I have a lovely apartment, I can comfotably afford to splurge every now and then. And I have my bf as a partner crime. I think this is a much more conducive environment to academic/intellectual stimulation than waiting tables 12 hours a day to just make rent.

So there's my explanation and justification for not accepting Columbia's offer. You may call me a fool. Maybe even complacent (please don't call me that, it's my biggest fear in the world.) But in the end, Columbus and OSU just feel right right now.

"When you get the blanket thing, you can relax, because everything you could ever want or be, you already have and are." - Bernard Jaffe, I Heart Huckabees

Gay Bashing

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It is incredible. My boyfriend and I were walking down the streets of the Short North minding our own business, trying to figure out what to do with our selves on a pleasant Friday evening. We were both wearing clothes that would not be considered “normal” for guys, that is, not a loose pair of khaki shorts with an even more ill fitting dress shirt, although neither of our outfits was outrageous.

Nonetheless, as we were making our way to High along Spring, a group of frat guys walked by. I felt physically threatened because there were so many of them, and Spring was absolutely deserted besides us. I braced myself as they walked by. No physical beating occurred, but they yelled “QUEERS” at us once they had walked past us. They didn’t even have the decency to say it to our faces.

As if that were not discouraging enough, as we made our way from Spring down toward Jeni’s Ice Cream on High, a group of macho dudes in a car shouted “FAGS” at us. We both felt angry, and a bit confused.

First, I must say that many gay people are accustomed to this sort of barbaric behavior. I have been called many vicious synonyms of “fag” and “queer” too many times to count. I expect it often times when I am in the Arena District, or in the University District, where classless and uncultivated types tend to abound. But, this is the Short North we are talking about! This is OUR territory. Everyone knows that the Short North is the de facto “Gay” district. As such, we should be able to flaunt around as freely as we desire, in only a rainbow thong if we so choose, without fear of being haggled.

Lately, I have been growing much fonder of Columbus. For instance, I discovered the Olentangy multi-use path, which gave me a newfound respect for the city. But Columbus is still the Mid West, a region notorious for its lack of tolerance, dignity, intelligence, and culture. In New York, where I have had the opportunity to spend a good deal of time, this would never happen. “FAG” as a pejorative insult would never be heard in the streets of Chelsea, the New York counterpart to the Short North (Although “fag” as in “Hey fag” a la Paris Hilton’s “Hey bitch” is quite prevalent.) It is accepted as gay territory. I should also add that I never felt threatened anywhere in Manhattan as I do here in Columbus. As much as I love this city, it is a product of the state of Ohio, and as such, gays can never truly feel at home.